Cringing At My Old Posts

We're going on a trip
Just to cringe at all my sh*t
(It was the only thing that rhymed I'm sorry)

It's been a while, so why not?

Why did I think "hai" was cool? Why?! Gosh darn it, ruining those first impressions like a boss. Good going, Ayumii. Let's move on before the headaches start rolling in.


(From "Locked Outside", March 3rd 2015)

No, you didn't.

Oh, for the love of...it's not even a gOOD PICK UP LINE


(From "TaxiLP: SUBSCRIBE!", March 5th 2015)

No. Just...what? //makes a face// No!

(From "'100 Mostly Useless Questions About Me' Challenge! Part 4", March 11th 2015)

I don't know why, but I get a feeling, just, you know, a tiny one, that I was pretty desperate.


(From "A Story", April 8th 2015)

NO NO NO NO NO NO WHAT IS THIS
Get the bleach. Get the extra-strong super-duper rib-tickling throat-scorching mega omega alpha beta delta 99.9% bacteria-free bleach so I can wash my brain out with it.


(From "I'm A Bad Blogger/Emoji Tag", May 6th 2015)

Ever heard of oxygen? You know? The substance that you breathe in so you can live?


(From "Poem #2", May 24th 2015)

I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. What...I don't even...I can't even begin to explain the level of cringe I feel right now.

(From "The Next Clue + TMI Tag", August 7th 2015)

Ayumii, Ayumii, Ayumii. Listen. Clary and Jace belong together. They're like...superglued together with holy angel blood. That's how much they belong with each other. So you can't just go in there and steal Jace. I'm so ashamed of my younger self, honestly.


(From "The Traitors by Tom Becker - A Book Review", August 17th 2015)

Woah woah woah woah. Chill. They're just fictional characters. They can starve if they want. Shh. Calm down.

Annnnnd we're done. I can't do any more of this without deleting my entire blog (ᗒᗩᗕ)

Hope you enjoyed this little cringe session and (hopefully) I'll be back soon with another post.

An Act of Defiance

Holy dolphin flippers, it's been //counts on fingers// five or six months since I last posted? Wow. I guess I was really busy, huh? //quickly closes video games// Very busy.

So the point of this post is an act of defiance. I tend to defy things quite often. Doing what you're told to do is quite boring, don't you think?

For example, I'm typing this in maths class, right now. When I'm meant to be doing mathy stuff and study for an upcoming test. But I am writing this post right now. I have successfully defied maths.

Am I going to stop there, though? Of course not. I'm going to defy one of the basic principles of communication.

Speech.

Yes, I've decided not to talk. One, it's an act of defiance, and I am the King of Defiancy. (Defiancy isn't even a word. That's how defiant I am. I have defied the English language by making up a new word. Even though I identify as female, I refer to myself as a king, defying the gender rules. Gosh, I'm brilliant at this.)

Two, by refusing to speak, and instead communicating through a pen and notepad, it gives me a chance to reconsider my words. 

You see, those who are not good with words turn to their physical strength in order to do harm. But those linguistically advanced people have the ability and the potential to hurt someone with their words. You probably know for a fact that someone calling you a stuck up b*tch is much more hurtful than getting punched in the face (in the long run). 

Ask yourself, how many times did you have the intention to joke around with someone but ended up accidentally hurting their feelings? Lots of these situations come to mind for me. Most of the time, I wasn't even consciously aware of the fact that what I was saying could potentially be hurtful.

By removing my own ability to speak, it means I have to think about what I say. I have less of a chance to hurt someone with any comments that I make. 

Also, by removing the element of tone from my communication, the words I say have to be taken literally, meaning that the things I write have little to no chance to be taken in an offensive way. 

I hope that by doing this that I will eventually be able to watch the things I say and minimise my chances of hurting people through my words.

~Ayumii